David’s Bridal Ultimate Summer Sale -Wedding Season

Style + Life + Fashion

Calling all brides-to-be! You don’t want to miss David’s Bridal’s Summer Sensational Clearance sale… Whether you are looking for a great deal on the wedding dress of your dreams, shopping for an affordable second dress, or in the market for some reasonably priced bridesmaid, Mother of th…

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Lifestyle Segment for Kids Rooms – ABC 33/40

Style + Life + Fashion

If you’re in the Birmingham Metro Area tune into ABC 33/40 on Monday, June 6, 2016 at 8:30 a.m. We will be sharing parenting tips on Talk of Alabama for safe decorating in kids and baby rooms.  Can’t wait to discuss home decor and some really cute products!…

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CMM Beauty Essentials – Memorial Day

Style + Life + Fashion

Summer is calling our names! Whether you’re vacationing on the beach, traveling back home or hanging out with your buddies, you want to look and feel your best during this unofficial kick off to summer.  CMM has the beauty essentials that make packing a breeze, keep hair and skin beautiful and more …

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Lists I Made Up That Have Only One Item So Far

Things I Would Do If I Were a Hippo

1. Spray poop all over the place to mark my territory

 

Really Sharp States That Can Be Used as Weapons

1. Tennessee

 

Bad Names for My Little Ponies

1. Shit Twinkle

 

Things I’ve Yelled at Stinkbugs in my Kitchen

1. “Get on the paper towel, fuckface!”

 

What You Should Know Before You Spend a Year on the Savanna as the Consort of a Lion King

1. Cats have barbed penises.

 

Worst Aquatic Vacation Bible School Themes

1. “Plunge Into Jesus”

 

Reasons I Can’t Get Published on McSweeney’s

1. I can’t finish lists.

 

 

I need to work on that, I guess. Anyway, I know a real live actual person who just got published on McSweeney’s. I even met her and she has like, skin and hair and everything! She’s a big supporter of me and she’s wickedly smart and funny and she understands my dislike for other human beings. Check out E.R. Catalano’s How To Dress for Your Body’s Parasitic Twin.

And if you’re so inclined, you can check out Letter From My Insurance Company Denying Coverage Of Mental Health Services For Show Choir-Related Trauma, which went up yesterday at The Big Jewel. I like those folks over there. Those are good folks. I wrote this piece last summer and [Unnamed Editor] at [Unnamed Pretty Important Publication] let it languish in Submittable purgatory for almost a year. I won’t name names, ‘cause I’m classy, and I don’t want to ruin my chances with that pub, like I probably did with McSweeney’s when I said they were a bunch of snobs who like the smell of their own farts. I mean…I may have said that. I probably didn’t. (I said it.)

I still love them, though.

 

from https://abbythewriter.com/2016/05/27/lists-i-made-up-that-have-only-one-item-so-far/

Curves Rock Fashion Weekend 2016 – Celebrating 5 Years

Style + Life + Fashion

Curves Rock Fashion Weekend is celebrating 5 years with a series of events starting July 20, 2016. Curves Rock Fashion Weekend (CRFW), an annual event for women with curves, is one of the largest fashion events for plus size women in the U.S. Featuring empowerment workshops and panel discussions tha…

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Four Seasons Resort Hualālai R – Summer Retreat Series

Style + Life + Fashion

Chicago, IL – Picture yourself taking a break to Hawaii Island’s only five-star beachside resort to renew your commitment to your fitness, nutrition and appearance. Imagine having a paddleboard adventure, hiking in a tropical setting or participating in a goal setting workshop to reset your as…

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Michelle Obama Wearing alice + olivia by Stacey Bendet

Style + Life + Fashion

Michelle Obama wore alice + olivia by Stacey Bendet yesterday, Wednesday, May 25th, 2016 while hosting the White House Turnaround Arts Talent Show in the East Room at the White House May 25, 2016 in Washington, DC. FLOTUS wears alice + olivia’s Eartha Flare Midlength Skirt paired with the Gracelyn R…

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